“She wasn’t wearing that dress. That dress was wearing her. How unfortunate.” This was a quote from a fashion critic at a Golden Globes red carpet analysis while watching video of a starlet wearing a fairly basic ensemble, that had one big bow on an otherwise straightforward dress. There was only one “look at me” element in the whole get-up, but the poor young woman looked like she was trying way too hard to pull it off by uncomfortably glaring at the cameras and daring anyone to tell her it wasn’t actually a bold fashion choice to have a giant bow right under her face.
Ever been worn by a dress?
I know that, as a child, I never for one minute thought that anyone was seeing something on me that I wasn’t imagining in my head. In my head, the sun dress with the soft, voluminous skirt made me in to an absolute queen, and I walked regally through my school yard, waving to other first graders like they were visiting dignitaries.
Somewhere along the way, we free-thinking, self-loving little girls start to get the sense that standing out is bad, and looking unremarkable is a goal. “Pretty” is upholding a collective norm that girls are polite, demure, and appropriately dressed for occasions; attractive enough, but not too outlandish, casual, sexy, or frumpy. Striking a perfect balance of pleasant to look at without rocking the boat.
No wonder we get confused when someone asks us what our unique, God- given purpose in life is. We have been subtly trained to conform. That, and having self- sacrificing seasons in the prime of our young lives where we become wives and mothers, filling support roles rather than starring in the story of our own lives. I get it - when you are in a supportive role, what you do to fill it can be exhausting and counter-intuitive to our passions and dreams.
If someone challenged you to create a lifestyle brand based on your personality, would you be able to put your finger on what makes you unique, desirable, feminine, or beautiful? I would likely have to hire a consulting team to tell me what clothes go with my “brand.” Then… the dress would wear me, if I were not absolutely sure of who I am, and why I wear what I do.
Developing a healthy identity is the first step to reflecting outwardly the true expression of your most desirable self. It requires knowing how deeply you are loved and accepted; getting healing from destructive thoughts and patterns that rob you of assurance in your unique contributions to this world.
Proverbs 31:17 says of the “radiant bride,” She wraps herself in strength, might, and power in all her works. That does not at all sound conforming or conflicted.
The TV tells us to feel good in our own skin, but it starts with feeling good in our own heads. Then, you can unravel what looks good on the outside, and be brave in your choices that make your outward appearance the creative work of art that reflects you.
Remarkable, brave, healthy you!
1. Do you have a go-to uniform? What does it say about who you think you are?
2. Do you feel others will judge you unfairly if you changed up your fashion choices?
3. What might be the biggest barrier to feeling freer in your fashion choices: knowing your identity, purpose, health, or dreams?
Goal setting and sharing: List 3 goals that you would like to accomplish (at home, at work, with family, etc.) that will allow you to live out your purpose regarding Fashion:
CREATED WOMAN JUNE LINE UP: FASHION
We believe that as Ambassadors of Christ, it’s okay to show up well! We believe our identity and self-worth comes through Christ and as we embrace our unique personality and quirks He has given us, our fashion becomes an outward expression of who we are created to be. Plus, fashion is a whole lot of fun!
June 11th, Hannah Breaux, How-to series
June 25th, Heather Frierson, How faith & fashion go together
Weekly Devotionals every Monday & Wednesday:
Modest is hotest
Nineteen & never
Is there a certain way to dress for church?
Ever been worn by a dress?
Does this fit me?